It was me.. Dead.

It was 2 AM at night I still was scrolling on my feed like it is involved in my daily routine. Nothing interesting was their at all so I put my phone back beside my pillow and stared at the blank wall. I kept thinking about my mistakes and future stuff like everyone do. 10 minutes later I was yawning like a goat so I  closed my eyes and decided to wait for sleep to come.

Few seconds later I saw myself in a place which was all deep white and nothing was there, not even my shadow. I walked in some direction I don’t know and kept walking expecting some results of this benumbed white atmosphere. “Hellooo..” I called for someone to hear me but it was the same. I was in my bedroom a minute ago but where the hell am I now? How would I get back? I was worried and scared and nothing was running through my mind until I saw someone whispering for help.

That person was some meters away from me. She was laying and the blood was flowing from her body continuously. I was nervous and scared after watching her in that condition. I stepped towards her almost dead body but still she was calling for help. I looked around expecting some other normal person like me but there wasn’t anyone. My feet were like shivering because I haven’t saw anyone like this before.

As I reached to her, my soul was thrilled…

There wasn’t any cloth on her body, her scars, her blood and dark blemishes covered her..

It was me.. laying there.. so weakened and still..

For a moment I didn’t understood what was going on. I ran away from that girl exactly like me but again I saw her in my way. I looked back at the previous one but it wasn’t there.

I screamed for help and again there wasn’t anyone to hear me. That girl called me again but I didn’t went close to her. I was so scared that I started crying. But for my surprise my tears weren’t coming from my eyes. I cried for help but no one replied. There was me and her in that deathlike world, completely white just like fog in the chilliest winter and not cold at all.

She stopped calling, the bleeding stopped.. No movement, nothing in response.

I prepared myself and went closer a bit to see what happened. Her body was burned badly and nothing was wrong with her face, I mean my face.. I touched her forehead and saw her bruised body. It was like she has been cursed so badly. Hundreds of thoughts were running through my mind. Her eyes were open and all deep black. I took my stole and covered her from it because the bruises were so bad I couldn’t even see them. I was crying and scared and wasn’t able to do anything for her (for myself..) My whole body turned pale and weaker.

Nothing changed, I was alone a moment before but I felt more alone now. When I saw a part of me died in front of me. I didn’t listened to me. I didn’t helped me.

It was me.. laying there.. so weakened and still..

It was me.. Dead.

In the world of heavenly white, cursed with netherworld’s sinned bruises.

-xOx-

How to make people laugh at your shitty talks.

 

So I was going through some posts on my feed and found nothing amusing. So I decided to write one for all of you. Well as always I say I am here to entertain people with my stupid blogs, yeah I don’t post much since few weeks or you can say months. But here I am again ready to eat your brains! Just kidding I don’t eat them at all.

I like to crack jokes in gatherings and love to make people laugh. But if someone don’t laugh at my jokes, I feel bad for them. As I titled this post ‘How to be funnier..’ so let’s write some points that can help you through this.

• Be carefree. Don’t care what impact will it leave on people’s mind just say whatever you want to say if it seems funny to you but it’s a different thing if you include some sexual things in it. Stay away from it if you really don’t want to create a weird scene.
• Be careful. Yeah really, don’t say things which don’t suite the scene. Well it depends on the situations and remember don’t be too bold to say anything which can hurt the guy in front. Like if he is fat and laughing a lot at your jokes and you say a thing like -“Your head looks like a boiled octopus to me!”. He may punch you hard (haha I would love that!)
• Laugh at your own jokes. Not too much because then you will look a dying seal if you talk and laugh at the same time.
• Not in mood. I know what it takes to laugh if you are sad or upset. But if you kinda resemble with me, I like to make people at least smile if they are feeling bad no matter how bad is my mood. I sometimes be a melo-drama in front of those homo sapiens. If I am seriously really disturbed then I walk away and don’t try to make an effort. I am what I am.
• Insult. That’s my favorite part! SumitOfficial knows it really well. Insult your friends! YEAAH! tell them they are ugly as nothing on this planet! God is taking revenge from you that he sent them in your life because once you stole a half pencil from an unknown bag! Weird pet names can help you much! and they look like Kamal R.Khan when they wear glasses. You don’t know who is he? Then I believe you are having an actual life depression.*Sympathy from me*

That’s him ^^^^^^^^^^^^^ yeah. I am sorry I can’t believe I have to see this in my posts I am just kind of realizing how my life can turn to worst in a second.

• Timing. It’s the most important thing to be funnier. If you don’t have it I have to say this ‘I feel sorry for you’ :'(. I mean really, I have seen people who say their thing when the topic is over 2 hours ago.
• Copy and paste of Dialogues. If you have seen a really funny movie and you find some dialogues hilarious, why don’t use them in front of people? For example- “Are maharaj! Tumare gurde kyu chhil rahe hain?” (Hey King! Why your kidneys are getting peeled off?) It means JEALOUSY in short if you didn’t got what I tried to say. Another example- “Khopdi tod saaale ka!” (Break the skull of that bastard!).. and so on.

Being funny is not difficult! just be yourself in a quirky way and make positive vibes every where you meet anyone. Spread Love, spread peace, treat everyone equally :p (stole that line from somewhere I won’t tell). And the only rule I want you guys to follow is:-

RACISM

No one deserves this ever.

-xOx-

Hi Readers!

I hope you liked this one so please leave comments about your funny and failed-to-make-laugh stories! I would be glad.

And yes if you guys need any classes for how to insult people you can find me on Instagram as @cleveridiot.nisha97 and if you don’t believe it, ask from Sumit I mentioned his website above. Keep practicing for being weird and refuse to be a dying seal. And yeah I liked that Boiled octopus punch haha! I may try this on someone at least once in my life time! 😀 😀

And if you still don’t know who is Kamal R.Khan then please let me know I would seriously write a motivational post for you.

Thanks A lot for Reading!

.The.Clever.Idiot.